Saturday, 21 April 2012

You know what?

One day I'm going to meet someone who actually finds me attractive.

One day we'll go out for lunch together, and order whatever the hell we want, and talk, and laugh, and afterwards we'll get ice cream and walk along the beach or through the woods or just down the street.

One day we'll wake up lazily and late on a weekend morning, and spend the day baking, and reading, and lying around in each other's arms.

One day we'll get up in the middle of the night, just for the hell of it, and get in the car and drive far far away in any direction that comes, and keep on driving until the sun rises, and then stop and watch it.

One day we'll get home late and run in out of the rain, order a take-away, strip off our wet clothes and fuck before the food arrives.

One day we'll have a stupid argument and shout at each other, and then come back and apologise, and kiss, and know everything is actually okay.

One day I'll breakdown and cry and cry and cry for reasons I can't even explain, but they'll hold me and let me cling to them, and they won't leave.

One day I'll be able to tell someone that I love them, and believe they might say it back.

One day I'll stand naked in front of them and feel beautiful as their eyes run over my body.

One day I'll realise there's someone I can tell everything and anything to. Someone I never have to hide around. And someone who feels the same way about me. So we can be simple and honest and naked together.

One day someone will find me.

One day.

You have no idea how much I wish I believed all of that, or any of that, or even one 'one day'.

I wish I believed it.

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